Here is the scenario; you think your child is using drugs. You are, and rightfully so, worried about their health, wellbeing, and safety. You ask your child and of course, they deny the accusations. But, you still have that nagging feeling. What should you do? Some parents opt for spying on their children. Some will use the old fashion methods of rummaging through their child’s room or following them. Others will setup hidden surveillance, which may include spy cams or audio recorders. At the time, it may sound like a good idea, but is it really?
The greatest benefit of spying on your child is that you can protect them. Most parents will say that you are going too far, but do you suspect your child’s life is in danger? Do you think they are using drugs, drinking alcohol, or seeing an older person? Most children and teenagers will deny the accusations, even if they are true. It is human nature. For that reason, spying can get you the proof you need. If you would spy on your children, it is important to do more than just spy. Use spying to assess the situation and then develop a plan, such as an intervention or therapy.
Another benefit of spying on your child is the options you have. As previously stated, some parents take the traditional approach of following their children or rummaging through their room. You can also use hidden audio and video recorders, although these are usually advised against. How you can spy, all depends on what you are looking for. For example, do you suspect your teenager is using the internet to communicate with adults or sharing too much personal information online? You can look at your computer’s internet history or install a remote access computer monitoring software like Sniperspy to see exactly what they type while on the computer.
Although there are a number of pros or plus sides to spying on children, especially if you, as a parent feel they are participating in dangerous behavior, there are many more cons or downsides. One of those is the breaking of trust. Parents should trust their children. Yes, it does sound ironic because, most teenagers will not admit dangerous behavior, such as using the internet inappropriately and taking drugs or alcohol. First, try an open line of communication. Make sure your children can always talk to you about anything.
Another downside to spying is if you get caught. This reverts to the breaking of trust. Your child or teenager will be unable to see the reason for your spying. Yes, you were trying to protect them, but your child will be so consumed with anger that they won’t understand the good intention behind. In fact, it may take years or until they become a parents themselves before they will be able to understand your concern and your action. Parents who are caught spying on their children, rarely have a good relationship with their children after this. Remember, kids, especially teenagers, are so clouded by anger.
Finally, it is important to remember laws. Spying on children, even teenagers, with hidden video and audio devices is not really advisable. In some states and countries this is illegal. For example, you install a hidden spy cam in your teenager’s room, hoping to catch them doing drugs. But this is the room that your child lives in, sleeps in, and dresses in. You are likely to catch your child in a state of undress. Although you could care less, because that was not what you were after, the authorities will care. You now have a picture of an underage child. This is illegal. If you do opt for hidden video surveillance, it is best to put it in your teen’s car, instead of their room.
Using spy gadgets to spy on your children has its pros and cons. And if parents wanted to have that peace of mind and should spy on their kids, parent should spy within reason. But the principal thing is the parent should take all the effort to grow the trust in the relationship. Whatever decision you make, think long and hard about your reason, as well as the consequences if you get caught. Is it worth it?